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Divorce to Healing

For those affected in any way by divorce and are in the process of healing or been healed.

Survive and Thrive: Day 2

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Today continues a series of 7 daily posts that will allow you to Survive and Thrive in your divorce recovery process. It will be available on the YouVersion Bible App eventually, but I wanted to share it with all of you first. May it be the blessing I pray it needs to be for you.

I am not sure exactly where or when I heard someone pray this prayer.  I first prayed it when I started my divorce healing process, and I pray it over my family every morning to this day.

Repeat after me:

“Jesus, may every scheme, device, and attack of the enemy against me(family, job, situation, etc) be brought to light and thwarted at every turn!!”

It focuses on three ways the enemy affects us in our process. It calls to how we need God’s power to move forward.

scheme — a plan, an underhanded plot (the enemy’s plan)

device — a thing made for a particular purpose (the enemy’s weapons)

attack — onslaught, assault (the enemy’s battle against us)

It also focuses on two desired and specific actions we need God’s help to handle the scheme, device and attack coming our way.

be brought to light — illumination, awareness

thwarted — to oppose successfully, frustrate or baffle, prevent from accomplishing a purpose

So, here is what the prayer is really saying:

“God, whatever plans the enemy has, whoever or whatever he wants to use to fulfill that plan, and whatever battle he has prepared for me; make me fully aware of it and make it totally unsuccessful against me.”

What a powerful prayer. You are asking God to make sure you see every plan, weapon, and attack from the enemy, and that He makes sure it is not successful!!

It took me years to finally see the power behind these words. Now I can have faith knowing that God will warn me and allow me to see what I am going through. He gives me the faith to know that He is watching out for me.  What the enemy means for harm, God will make sure it works out for good.

Pray this prayer every day and in every situation. Watch your faith gain strength. Watch how God protects you as you stop wondering how to prepare and learn to fight your current battle and those yet to come.

Genesis 50:20

20 As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good in order to bring about this present result, to preserve many people alive.

Job 28:11

11 “He dams up the streams from flowing, And what is hidden he brings out to the light.”

Isaiah 52:12

12 But you will not go out in haste, Nor will you go as fugitives;
For the Lord will go before you, And the God of Israel will be your rear guard.

If you would like another great free resource, enjoy the
available on the YouVersion Bible App.
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Survive and Thrive: Day 1

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Today starts a series of 7 daily posts that will allow you to Survive and Thrive in your divorce recovery process. It will be available on the YouVersion Bible App eventually, but I wanted to share it with all of you first. May it be the blessing I pray it needs to be for you.

When I reflect on my divorce healing, I can point to the one decision I made that allowed me to finally start moving down the road to wholeness. That decision was to trust God, NO MATTER WHAT!!!

I had already given my life to Jesus a short time before I had to make this decision, to fully trust Him. I still need God’s wisdom and guidance even today to fully understand all He did through the process.

You will fall into one of these three categories with God:

  1. You have given your life to Jesus and are saved.
  2. You have not given your life to Jesus yet.
  3. You have some kind of relationship with God/Jesus/religion etc.

There are many places and people you may have entrusted with your spiritual awareness or beliefs. It may have happened when you where a child, after you started a family, or when you were late in life. No matter which group you are in, it is my belief that without turning your life over to Jesus, you will never be able to fully heal. Only God, your Creator, can fully heal a broken heart.

You may be able to be happy, move on to another relationship, feel better about yourself and your situation, but that part of your heart that needs a total healing will never completely heal. You will live the rest of your life missing out on the greatest possible life that God has for you.

Of the many people I have been blessed to help, the only ones that fully healed were those that have surrendered their life to Jesus. They asked Him to do only what He can do; heal that which surgeons and mental health professionals cannot. A spirit wounded, a life changed, a heart broken, a family torn apart. No matter how hard, they trusted the only One worthy of trust.

Until you have experienced the love, grace, and mercy that God gives during this healing season you will never experience a life that is full of hope, completeness, and thankfulness. It is a cleansing like no other.  It is like seeing a beautiful sunrise at the ocean for the very first time.

If you feel you need to reconnect with God or want to make Jesus your personal Lord and Savior, repeat this prayer:

“Jesus, I need you. I am hurting and I am asking for You to save me. I give every part of my life to you, now and forever. Jesus, You are my Lord and Savior. Please forgive me all of my sins and flood me with you love, grace, mercy, wisdom, and understanding. My life is Yours. Heal me and make me whole. In Your precious name, Jesus. Amen.”

Over the next 6 days, you will be able to learn the powerful prayers God gave me that I use to this day. You will learn insightful practices that will allow you to live life in a way that will propel your healing forward.

John 3:16

16 “For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life.

Proverbs 2:10

10 For wisdom will enter your heart
And knowledge will be pleasant to your soul

Psalm 34:18

18 The Lord is near to the brokenhearted
And saves those who are crushed in spirit.

If you would like another great free resource, enjoy the
available on the YouVersion Bible App.

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The Reflection

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The new year always lends itself to reflection. Thinking of the past. Good and bad. Accomplishments and missed expectations. Successes and failures.

This year has been a sincere blessing for me in many ways, while also revealing my short comings.

Divorce to Healing has seen tremendous growth in exposure, readership, and engagement. It has also made me wonder where we fell short helping people.

On April 12th, the Divorce to Healing Reading Plan on the YouVersion Bible App was released. In less than 8 months, over 13,300 people engaged by downloading a free copy to a phone or other device. And thus began a seed of healing.

As of Dec 31st, over 4,800 people had completed all 31 days of the Reading Plan. And thus began the next steps in continued healing.

On August 31st, a paperback version of the Reading Plan with additional resources was released on Amazon. 16 copies were sold, 3 of which I bought and sent to my family. And even more people took a step towards wholeness.

On this blog, over 3000 views from over 1000 different people in 49 different countries were seeking wisdom, encouragement, and understanding to help them make sense of this thing we call divorce.

And yet, I wonder……

Did they all know that they have been prayed for daily? Have they allowed God to do the healing work in their hearts, minds, and souls that bring the only kind of peace that satisfies? Will they continue to reach out to their family, friends, counselors, pastors, and others for the help they still need? Have we helped in any small way?

Who is that next person that God wants to touch today? What is holding some people back? How can I be of greater service to my fellow man, struggling through the same pain and hurt I experienced?

As we continue down this path together, I want to thank you for letting God do His perfect work in you. I will be here with you and want you to know, you are not alone. There are many people that desire exactly what you do — healing & wholeness.

Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”
We are here for you.
Be blessed!!

A Prayer for the Divorced — Christmas

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A Prayer for the Divorced —  Christmas

Dear Lord,

Today, I pray for those who are alone. I pray for those who are desperate. I pray for those who have lost so much. I pray for everyone hurting and needing relief. I pray for those who cannot be with their children. I pray for those who want to restore that which is now gone. I pray for those that need hope. I pray for those that don’t understand what happened. I pray for those that just want the pain to end.

Only You, God, have the answers. Only You, Lord, can bring  true peace and understanding. Only You, Jesus, can save and redeem that which is lost.

Father God, may you pour out  your love on everyone reading this right now. May you reach them wherever they are and reveal your true self to them. Fill them with your peace. Bring them Your wisdom and help them to know You in spirit and in truth. Grant them complete healing and wholeness today.

For those that do not know the saving grace of Jesus, may you lead them to You. May they make you, Jesus, their personal Lord and Savior. Pour out Your saving grace and mercy on all those who want to truly know You, Lord.

Thank you, God, for giving your son, Jesus, to us. Today, may we celebrate His birth as you reveal Your love to us all in a greater way today.

In Jesus’ mighty name,

Amen

Understanding Forgiveness

There are so many feelings and situations surrounding divorce, none more discussed and often misunderstood than forgiveness.

It is hard to add anything much of value to this video, except that through Jesus Christ I have been able to forgive and move on into the next chapter of my life.

Feel free to comment below.

Be blessed!!

Amazing News!!!

Thank to all you you in the Divorce to Healing community!! I am blown away by how many of you have downloaded and completed the YouVersion Reading Plan. Thank you for giving God room to heal you and bring you closer to wholeness.

Feel free to share your comments below.

If you have not yet gone through the reading plan and want to, here is the link: http://www.bible.com/reading-plans/2440-divorce-to-healing-31-wholeness

If you want to connect via Facebook, join us:                                                       http://www.facebook.com/divorcetohealing

If you would like a copy of the book, it is available on Amazon:           http://www.amazon.com/Divorce-Healing-31-Days-Wholeness/dp/1530366364

Process of Time

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It is said that time heals all wounds. In my opinion, the process of time helps the healing process, but that is not what heals. Seeking wisdom on the correct path to fix the issues and following through with that wisdom is what will bring the healing, in the process of time.

If you break your arm, you wouldn’t just say “I’ll be ok. Time will heal it.”. Wrong. You will end up with an arm which tries to heal, but the bones are not set together and held tight by a cast so it can heal correctly. You may eventually not have pain, but you will have an arm that is much weaker and will be easier to break again in the future.

When we gain the wisdom of doctors for physical healing, they know that they must reset the bones as close together sometimes inserting screws to hold them together so that when the body heals (in the process of time) it will be as strong as it can be. It may never be as strong as it originally was, but if healed correctly, it will be usable again and able to withstand whatever comes next.

When we just move on from divorce and do not discover true wisdom on how to heal a broken heart, you are just expecting it to heal. It doesn’t work that way. It is like breaking your arm and not seeing the doctor. You are at a much higher risk of your heart being broken again and again because it never healed correctly.

One of the most vivid images I had when I was struggling through my own healing was what I felt was an open heart surgery. The image was of a huge slice all way from my neck to my stomach, and the scar that came from it. I had given all my hurt, pain, feelings, emotions, stress, and expectations to God and told Him to heal my heart. But it left a huge scar. I have it to this day. The scar of divorce.

Now, before you think that I despise the scar, I see it for what it is. An event that happened. And the scar is just proof of that.

Am I healed? Yes, thank you, Jesus!! Does it still hurt? No. Does the scar remind me of the greatest healing ever in my life? YESSSS!!!!

The scar is not a bad thing. When I realized that the consequences of an open heart surgery to fix my heart was a leftover scar, I came to grips with it. I now see it as a daily reminder of the amazing healing that has happened and that I can now share my testimony of my healing to many others. I can encourage them to know that healing is available, if they are willing to do what it takes to fix the issue (broken heart) not just letting it heal on it’s own. It will never heal correctly and be a heart that will not have the strength to handle the job of pumping life through your body if you don’t get the help you need.

Of course, through the process of time, things seem to get better. My point is that without dealing with the real problems, you will never heal fully and you will be more susceptible to pain and suffering in the future. Going through a divorce is already painful enough. Do what it takes now to make it better later.

It is so great to see people, even after only a few weeks of surrendering to the process and getting real help, experiencing real change that can be seen by those around them. They may not see or feel it, but others can. We are usually the last ones to see and feel the change in ourselves that others see in us.

The process of time will bring forth the healing, as you are faithful to do what it takes to attain healing and wholeness through the One who is the only one that can repair a broken heart. His name is Doctor Jesus, and He knows how to fix your heart.

My heart is healed and whole. It doesn’t hurt anymore.

But I still have a scar. And I am fine with that.

A free devotional called “Divorce to Healing: 31 Days of Healing and Wholeness” is available to all my readers here.

You can order you own copy of the book, “Divorce to Healing: 31 Days of Healing and Wholeness” from Amazon here.

Old Silver Bowl

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Have you ever felt used up, old, and forgotten? Do you see yourself as a vessel that held great value at one time, but is now nothing more than an ancient dish?

So many times we see ourselves with a totally different set of eyes than the ones God gave us at birth. Maybe it is because life changes us and makes us believe things about ourselves that aren’t true. We see ourselves in a cracked, scratched, and foggy mirror thinking that it is us who are cracked, scratched, and foggy. At times, we just assume the mirror is fine and it is us with the issues.

Yes, we have issues, but remember that the mirror (your self-image) may not be reflecting the truth about you.

I tell my wife sometimes, “It is not what you say or think about yourself, it is what I say and think about you that matters.” Now, if I am being an asswipe of a husband, then that is not a good thing to say. I am merely explaining to her that how she sees herself and how I see her are through two totally different set of eyeballs.

God sees you through His eyes. Realize that what you see, your perception of yourself and your situation, may be totally off like a cracked mirror. There is a time and a place for being honest and real with yourself, but it usually is about your situation and not about who you are as a person.

If you need to change and improve, by all means, get right. Take the steps toward improving your mental, physical, and spiritual well-being. It matters and it should, just know that the person God made is different than the mistakes you made or what happened to you.

In my devotional time today, I started reading Ezra. (Yes, even after 25+ years of being a Christian, I had to check the table of contents to figure out what page it was on…..pray for me)

This book starts out with the account of Cyrus, the king of Persia, calling his peeps to gather up all the stuff that was given to him when Nebuchadnezzar took the people of Israel into bondage in Babylon for 70 years. It was all counted out to a priest of Judah. Something jumped out at me.

It talks about 30 gold dishes, 1,000 silver dishes, 29 silver pans, 30 gold bowls, 410 duplicate silver bowls, and 1000 miscellaneous items.

Duplicate. Just extra. Leftover. Not usually used. Did you catch that?

Why is that such a big deal? To me it makes me feel remembered by God, of value, made mentioned of.

If a duplicate old silver bowl is included in the greatest and most widely printed book of all time, don’t you think that God valued that old silver bowl enough to have it recorded and saved so that over 2000 years later we can still read about it? It’s just an old silver bowl, right?

No. It is so much more than that. It was a part of God’s house that had been destroyed in Jerusalem and is going to be rebuilt soon. It had value. It needed to be accounted for and included in what God is going to do in the future.

You may be at a point in your life where you have no idea what the future holds, there is no value in what you are going through. You may feel like an old silver bowl.

But, oh…..you are God’s precious vessel and he has a place for you in what He is building. He wants you and needs you to be a part of it.

God values you enough to mention something as insignificant as an old bowl to show you how much He values you, His own precious child.

He sees you with heavenly eyes. You do not place your own value, because you are His and He thinks you are priceless!!

Come on, old silver bowl. Let’s go see where you are going next. I heard it is a palace that will be absolutely amazing!!

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